so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
Randomize
