Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
Randomize
