"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
Randomize