Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
Non-Jews are for practice
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
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