nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize
