I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
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