at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
You did what with his pubic hair?
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
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