i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
Randomize
