I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Randomize
