drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
