There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
Randomize
