To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
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