yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
Randomize
