wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
Randomize
