this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize
