Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Randomize
