at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
Randomize