Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.