apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
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