just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
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