shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Randomize
