He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
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Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
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I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
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