Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
