who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
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