Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
