A little boy walked by his parents room one night, looked through the keyhole, and said "and that bitch tells me to stop sucking my thumb!"
She is in my trunk
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
her vagine was all disorganized.
I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
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