The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize
