I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
it glows. i had to have it.
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Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
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I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
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