Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
Randomize
