I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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