Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
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I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
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