Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
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