well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
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