He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
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