Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
Randomize
