So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
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