i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
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