after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
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