check it out our google latitudes are spooning
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Randomize
