The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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