Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
Randomize
