I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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