There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
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