just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
wow bdsm is so cute
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
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