am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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