please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
Randomize
