he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
Randomize
