Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
maybe you met your husband and you just don't know it yet
and other hilarious jokes you can tell yourself
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize