why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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