GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize
