Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
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