Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
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